Thursday, August 18, 2011


Obsessive relationships frequently occur with people that are ordinarily already somewhat obsessive. This is essentially found with Pluto hard aspects to personal planets and even some of the nicer ones, other aspects do apply. In synastry, it is often the same aspect, but the aspects are from one person's Pluto to the others personal planets. It is also true that you do not have to be an obsessive person to end up being one, or in an obsessive relationship sometimes there are those people that bring these qualities out.  Pluto relationships or obsessive relationships usually include many Pluto aspects between one another and sometimes they have the aspects themselves, which seem to amplify the obsessive possibility. Pluto rules over obsession in Astrology. He is all or nothing, he penetrates deep below the surface of an appearance, nothing gets past his razor sharp perception and nothing is too low, to rash or too drastic to get what he wants. Pluto and Scorpio are fixed, they don't change course easily, and once focused, they can easily be consumed, or obsessed. 

The obsessive relationship usually begins with an inexplicable lure of that be intriguingly eerie, ethereal, or at the minimum a powerful magnetic draw to one another that is mesmerizing and even intoxicating. 

One of the most powerful connections that can also be extremely obsessive and built around control is 

Pluto Square Sun in synastry.( You can read more of the darker side of this placement in the members area.) 

The key within any obsessive relationship or a Plutonic relationship is to be sensitive to one another, and not to push one another's buttons. 
Do not mix up the obsession with Love, they are not the same thing. When someone is obsessed with another, it can be very dangerous. If you are seeing signs of mental manipulation, control through many different means, especially money, or not allowing privacy or freedom, sometimes it's mental manipulation through passive aggressive means, one should know when it doesn't feel good, to get out. 

The obsessive relationship can sometimes be unconsciously provoked. It is the behavior of the two together that causes insecurity, jealousy or just plain ornery behavior. It usually shows up when both people possess a strong ego, and won't give in when it is the most needed.  Understanding not to play games is critical. 

Pluto or heavy Scorpio people might fall into relationships that become obsessive more than the other signs, but again the hard aspects seem to hold more weight. 

For instance, a Gemini can be obsessive if they have Pluto in a hard aspect ( Conjunct, Square or Opposite) any of their personal planets, and this goes for all signs. 

If you are one that seems to attract obsessive people( see: extended articles in members area to see if you have any aspects that may be responsible) I have seen numerous cases especially with Venus-Pluto aspects both hard or easy aspects, attracting obsessive relationships as well as the harder ones. I have also seen Neptune in the 1st house attracting stalkers and obsessive people, but Pluto is usually playing a role.

If you have ever been in an obsessive relationship then you are aware of just how dangerous they can be. In obsessive relationships, things tend to "fly out of control" very fast in a Big way. Intense emotions and strong desires permeate the relationship and are often so strong that trying to contain them, become nearly impossible. 

With Pluto's role, it's not quite certain if, the more Plutonic person ( heavy aspects with Pluto in their natal chart) provokes more of the obsessive energy by by playing coy, withdrawing, sabotaging, being secretive or trying to control the others natural expression OR if the Non plutonic or planet person inadvertently pulls these intense behaviors out of the Pluto person,  by not understanding the intense feelings and how to handle one predisposed to react intensely.

Whichever, side the obsessive relationship is on, it is most often driven by fear of loss a need to control, jealousy or in a more sinister way, to gain emotional control of their Partner, to test the feelings.

There is usually strong sexual undercurrent which brings these irrational feelings to the surface. And although the relationship is highly passionate on the onset, it can take a turn for the worse if both parties are not mature enough to handle the intensity. Sometimes, an obsessive relationship may happen that is based on fantasy, and not a real interaction. This can be even more dangerous since its obsession with delusion. 

Whatever type of obsessive relationship is at hand there seems to be something about one another that provokes the other into the fear driven state. These compulsions will be a theme of the relationship.  

Did you ever wonder why some couples fight, scream, throw things, destroy the an other's property, and then over the course of a couple of days they're back together? Yes, this is an obsessive relationship and how obsessive behavior can be extremely damaging.

There are many other aspects that make for an obsessive relationship including but not limited to Lilith and Pluto

If you would like continue to read more about the other aspects  you must be a member to continue reading. 

Members click here to view: Astrology of Obsession Part II. or Obsessive Relationships, Pluto Square Sun the Dark Side, Pluto Relationships all or nothing part two, Pluto in Partners 8th house extended, Moon in Partners 8th house part 2 & 3, The obsessive boss, and more..

If you need guidance in your relationship see my reports or consultations page, for illuminating insights. Email questions are available for a quick response.


  1. Ah lovely pluto...I hate you! ha, take my soul pluto please! Can you say i have had a pluto relationship?????????arghhhhh

  2. i have had this aspect with the love of my life. It ended poorly but I still love him.

  3. I have a sun squaring a man's pluto, whom I know personally. I think about him frequently but at times it feels as though it is not my own thought and some times they are. I will be going about my life per usual and BAM thoughts and feelings of him will invade me. Other times, I have him on my mind and maybe my thoughts invade him. I do not like this and I know I have mirrored him.
    I just pray to God for a healthy exchange. I do not want any obsessive compulsiveness between us.